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About The Book

“An addictive read; a strong recommendation for those who like suspense tinged with a little romance.”—Booklist

A woman without a memory struggles to discover the truth about her past and her identity in this cerebral and dark thriller reminiscent of works by bestselling authors S.J. Watson and Ruth Ware.

I have no memory of what happened but I was told I killed my son. And you believe what your loved ones, your doctor and the police tell you, don't you? My name is Emma Cartwright. Three years ago I was Susan Webster, and I murdered my twelve-week-old son Dylan. I was sent to Oakdale Psychiatric Institute for my crime, and four weeks ago I was released early on parole with a new identity, address, and a chance to rebuild my tattered life. This morning, I received an envelope addressed to Susan Webster. Inside it was a photograph of a toddler called Dylan. Now I am questioning everything I believe because if I have no memory of the event, how can I truly believe he's dead? If there was the smallest chance your son was alive, what would you do to get him back?

About The Author

Jenny Blackhurst grew up in Shropshire where she still lives with her husband and children. Growing up she spent hours reading and talking about crime novels so writing her own seemed like natural progression. She is the author of How I Lost You and Before I Let You In.

Product Details

  • Publisher: Atria/Emily Bestler Books (October 10, 2017)
  • Length: 384 pages
  • ISBN13: 9781501168833

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Raves and Reviews

"An outstanding and original thriller with a complex relationship between three women at its heart and an explosive conclusion."

– B.A. Paris, New York Times bestselling author of Behind Closed Doors, on BEFORE I LET YOU IN

“Dark, twisty, and intricately plotted, How I Lost You kept me glued to the pages. I read it in one sitting, couldn’t put it down!”

– -A. J. Banner, #1 Kindle and USA Today bestselling author of THE GOOD NEIGHBOR and THE TWILIGHT WIFE

“Susan’s engaging character and the story's well-crafted twists make this an addictive read; a strong recommendation for those who like suspense tinged with a little romance.”

– Booklist


– Publishers Weekly

"Blackhurst has got the right formula for a clever psychological thriller."

– RT Book Reviews

"A whirlwind story."

– Shelf Awareness

"Books like How I Lost You are the reason I love reading . . . I haven't been this enraptured with a story in years . . . . I didn't have the slightest inkling what was coming. I didn't know who was a culprit, I didn't know anything, and I was so very happy in my ignorance!"

– 5,171 Miles Book Blog

"If you enjoy a book full of twisted suspense that is dark, gripping, and a bit disturbing, go ahead and pick up Jenny Blackhurst's HOW I LOST YOU and add it to your fall line up!"

– The Suspense is Thrilling Me

"A novel that will keep you guessing until the end . . . I recommend this to fans of Ruth Ware and Paula Hawkins."

– The Wit & Wonder Agency

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More books from this author: Jenny Blackhurst