Numb, Party of One

A Memoir of Healing from Dissociation

Published by Post Hill Press
Distributed by Simon & Schuster

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About the Book

Maria Cassano thought she was a sociopath—until a trauma therapist diagnosed her with a dissociative disorder and helped her feel again.

On the bright side, Maria Cassano was always the calmest person in the room. On the not-so-bright side, she was pretty sure she’d die alone. All logic and no empathy makes Maria a terrible girlfriend.

Then came the diagnosis: trauma-induced dissociation, not sociopathy. According to her new therapist, this numbness had a name—Depersonalization-Derealization Disorder (DPDR)—and Maria supposedly had profound emotions buried deep inside. Unfortunately, if she ever wanted to feel them, she’d first need to dig them up with intensive trauma therapy.

Cue Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR), a psychotherapy treatment that uses bilateral stimulation to heal PTSD. In layman’s terms, you focus on your most messed up memories and watch a glowing square bounce back and forth. It cracked Maria wide open, but being human again was a whole other can of worms—especially when it came to dating in her thirties.

As the failed flings piled up, Maria found that before she could move forward, she had to go back. Back to her brother’s suicide journal she found at seven years old. Back to her parents’ broken marriage. Back to her best friend’s untimely death. Back to all the things that made her a relationship-dodging robot in the first place.

About the Author

Maria Cassano is a professional writer and editor from Long Island, New York. Her work has been published in HuffPost, Bustle, NBC, Food & Wine, The Daily Beast, and others. She also writes on Medium, where she explores topics such as relationships, feminism, and healing from dissociation. Maria holds a BA in English with a minor in creative writing from The State University of New York at New Paltz. She currently lives in Suffolk County with her partner, their two dogs, and her newfound emotions.

Product Details

  • Publisher: Post Hill Press (February 2, 2027)
  • Length: 224 pages
  • ISBN13: 9798895659489

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Raves and Reviews

“Maria Cassano has written something rare: a memoir about the trauma response no one talks about. While the cultural conversation around mental health has centered on feeling too much, Numb, Party of One makes the case for the other half of the spectrum: the women who feel nothing, function perfectly, and have no idea why. Sharp, witty, and deeply necessary.”

– Karen Salmansohn, bestselling author of Your To-Die-For Life

"Maria Cassano’s memoir is so deeply personal but also so unsettling in its universality that I couldn’t stop reading it. Her self-deprecating humor cut with her unflinching honesty is a hook that ensnares you. This is the Millennial memoir for everyone who has ever battled addictions, mental health or simply just growing up."

– Emily Bond, former co-editor of HuffPost's Books Newsletter and editor of The Lit Drop

"Turning to therapy in hopes of healing what's holding you back in life is already such a vulnerable act, but Maria Cassano takes it about a hundred steps further by writing an unflinchingly honest and frequently witty memoir about it. Numb: Party of One is a heartbreaking yet healing read for anyone who's ever internalized the message that their emotions are an inconvenience to others."

– Danielle Kraese, editor at Bustle Digital Group

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