This reading group guide for IN THE ABSENCE OF MEN includes an introduction, discussion questions, and ideas for enhancing your book club. The suggested questions are intended to help your reading group find new and interesting angles and topics for your discussion. We hope that these ideas will enrich your conversation and increase your enjoyment of the book.

Introduction

From the author of the international bestseller Lie with Me comes the tale of an affair between an aristocratic teenager and a soldier, as they discover the possibilities and perils of first love.

Summer, 1916. With German zeppelins on the skyline, the men of Paris are off at war. For Vincent, sixteen and still too young to fight, this moment of dread is also a moment of possibility. An electrifying encounter with Marcel, an enigmatic middle-aged writer, draws Vincent’s desires out into the light. As he’s taken under Marcel’s wing, Vincent begins a dangerous affair with Arthur, the son of his governess and a young soldier on leave. Together, they share a secret that everyone seems to know and yet everyone remains silent about.

In this stunning portrait of young love, Philippe Besson depicts a young man who plays by his own rules and is not afraid of who he is. In the afternoons, Vincent is mentored by Marcel, the great novelist, in the city’s opulent cafés as they draw the judgment of society. And at night, he hides Arthur in his bedroom as the two risk everything to be together. Their affair initiates them into a world of pleasure and shields them from the encroaching war. During this magical week away from the trenches, Vincent shelters Arthur with happiness, reassuring him, “Nothing will happen to you.”

Tender and harrowing, In the Absence of Men captures how exhilarating and heart-crushing it is to fall in love for the first time. Besson’s award-winning novel “beautifully captures the romance and amorality of gilded youth” (The Independent).

Topics & Questions for Discussion

The book begins, “I am sixteen. I am as old as the century.” What does this tell us about how Vincent thinks of himself, and the times that he lives in?

“The war was something illusory which did not in the least prevent us from frequenting theaters and restaurants, from living our everyday lives,” Vincent narrates on page 19. What does this say about how the upper-class views and experiences the war?

In this book, consumption emerges as a theme. What are some things that are “consumed” in the book, either literally or figuratively?

On page 32, Vincent states: “No, I am not a traitor. Yes, I am a young man of sixteen, with no inhibitions, who believes he has no need to divide the world into what is good and what is evil.” Later, on page 53, he says, “Being sixteen is my excuse.” Do you agree with Vincent? What can age be an excuse for? In what ways can age suspend agency, or moral judgement? Why?

Throughout the book, Vincent repeats variations of, “I have green, almond-shaped eyes, dark hair, the complexion of a girl.” Parts of this description change; parts of it stay the same. When are the moments he chooses to mention it? Why? And why is this description “what comes closest to encompassing [him]” (page 91)?

Silence emerges as an important motif. Where and when do you notice silence throughout the novel?

On page 49, Vincent narrates, “This is an instant of you forever, whatever might befall.” At first glance, this statement is an oxymoron. Discuss this line with the group—what does it accomplish?

In Part II of the novel, the narration changes. The story is told in letters written by the characters, and as a result, the story is less filtered through Vincent’s point of view. What do you learn about the characters and their relationships in this part of the book?

In one of his letters, Marcel writes, “I do not have the preconceptions of the bigot, and I have more faith in mankind than I do in a morality in which everything is proscribed” (page 111). Analyze this statement with respect to Marcel and his relationship to Vincent.

On page 124, Marcel says to Vincent, “You are sixteen and I am forty-five. Of the two, I am the one who knows. Of the two, you are the one who is right. When one is sixteen, one is always right.” What does he mean by this? How does this dynamic play out in their relationship?

On page 159, Vincent is with Arthur’s mother, and he narrates, “At that precise moment, the intimacy between us is absolute.” What does absolute intimacy mean? Does Vincent ever reach “absolute intimacy with Marcel? With Arthur?

What do you make of the twist at the end, and how Vincent proceeds in the wake of it?

Return to the epigraph at the beginning of the book. Consider the words and the source. How do you understand it in the context of the story?

Now that you’ve finished the book, reflect on the title, In the Absence of Men. What do you take this to mean?

Enhance Your Book Club

Research Marcel Proust and his masterwork, In Search of Lost Time. How does this background deepen your understanding of the story?

Look up the timeline of how World War I progressed in and around France.

Find and share some more love letters from soldiers on the World War I front. What do they teach you about the setting and period?