Q. What’s your greatest flaw?
A. My greatest flaw is not being able to answer questions seriously.
Q. What is your greatest achievement?
A. I don't have one yet, but I hope to clone non-psychopathic dogs and be the world's first Esperanto talk show host.
Q. Which living person do you most admire?
A. I admire my husband for his ability to go into a fugue state when I begin to speak.
Q. How would you describe perfect happiness?
A. This is a question for beauty contestants, isn't it, and I'm supposed to say world peace. However, if that's not possible, then I'd be thrilled with a cup holder for my car. I frequently yearn for a latte, but all attempts to transport one from the cafe to my home have proved disastrous. I also have ideas about cloning my dead dog. I saw part of that Stephen King movie about the dog that comes back to life, so I'm apprehensive about trying the U-Kan-Clone! kit that I bought from an infomercial. What was the question again?